Kyrgyzstan Declares Anarchy

by Narek

Cars salute Anarchy with spontaneous combustion

Kyrgyz interim Government led by Roza Otunbayeva made drastic reforms to country’s Constitution last week, changing the official governance model to anarchy. “First of all I want everyone to understand that this is not another revolution. Simply, we chose anarchy to be our new governance model.” – declared Otunbayeva during her address  on Ы TV last Friday. “We’ve had too many revolutions lately.

iSexuals Demand iPhone Marriages

by iNarek

Massachusetts considers iPhone 4 iMarriages - T-shirt design

Boston, Massachusetts – After Steve Jobs, guru of the Apple world, unveiled the new iPhone 4,  Massachusetts legislators are seriously considering amendments to marriage legislation. Despite of some controversy Massachusetts was among the first US states to permit gay marriages, and now the state’s public demands to bring liberalism of  marriage laws to a new level.

Non-Stop Rains Evoke Anti-British Sentiments in Armenia

Protestors: 'Take Rain Home'

by Narek

British Embassy in Armenia found itself in a midst of a massive protest demonstration this morning. Starting from mid March Armenia has been  going through what people started to call an abnormal rain season. Some chose to get extremely dissatisfied with every day rains, while others chose to simply be  pissed off, but an estimated crowd of 7000 protesters, despite the heavy rain, was determined to let the British know that such behavior would not be tolerated any longer.

WWII Victory Parade in Moscow, May 9, 2010

By Sergey

World Leaders at May 9 Victory Parade in Red Square

Turkey Celebrates Denial Day

by Narek

Turkish youth is crazy about Denial Day

Istanbul, Turkey – Denial Day is Turkey’s most original and exotic holiday. Every April 24th entire nations gathers in festivities, fun games and of course denial. The family oriented holiday is over 90 years old and has become one of the most expected holidays of the year. Probably the closest to Denial Day among European holidays is April Fool day, and not because the two holidays are celebrated in April, but because

Armenian Research Proves 96.31% Of Earth Are Armienian

Illustration of Armenian diversity

by Narek

Group of Armenian scientists unveiled today results of a research that may be a very serious bid for Nobel prize next year. The 24 year long study proves that 96.31% of world population are Armenians. Professor Gervorg Ayqyuuni and his team invited a press conference to present the final results of the research. “Indeed now we have undeniable facts that 96.31% of the people of Earth are Armenians.

Catholic Priests Concerned Over Child Obesity

By Sergey

Catholics campaign for healthy and slim kids

Catholics around the world have voiced growing concern over what they call a “critical challenge facing the Christian world”. Bishops from 15 Catholic states organized a forum in Zurich from March 12th-15th to discuss the pressing issue of child obesity. Catholic indignation was sparked in Milwaukee and Wisconsin, where local priests were the first to find themselves struck by a severe shortage of  regular-sized boys.

Al-Qaeda on Strike

by Narek

Terrorists demand social justice

Al-Qaeda employees organized a chain of strikes near organization’s head offices around the world, with biggest strikes being in Kabul – Afghanistan, Khartoum – Sudan, Riyadh – Saudi Arabia and Portland – USA. Low and mid level terrorists on strike demand social benefits, vacation days, trainings and salary increases. “I don’t see why we should be treated any different than an employee of say umm…corn flakes factory. We go to work every morning, very often we stay overtime, not to mention that our job is much, much more dangerous” said Mahmoud Al-Blowupi in a brief interview.

Obama Admits Taking Fake Sick Leave Amid Snowstorm in DC

By Sergey

'I'm actually entitled to 12 paid sick leave days per year, so let's not overreact here', President

Washington DC, USA – President Barack Obama addressed the nation early Friday with apologies for taking dubious sick leave while nation’s capital suffered from heavy snowstorm and economic crisis was at peak.  To note, earlier on Thursday President’s press secretary had announced to media that president was on sick leave for food poisoning and will stay in bed till Monday.

Netherlands Legalize Post-Natal Abortions

By Sergey

Dutch parliament gives parents of losers a second chance

Amsterdam, Netherlands – Dutch legislation approved in final reading piece of legislation on controversial “abortion bill”. The new law amends previous legislation to enable couples extend control over family planning. It makes possible to abort children up to 18 years old after the moment of birth, before civil status of fetus has been effectively formed, if the offsprings fall short of parent expectations.